Every piece of fiction worth reading is by design a minefield of lies. For that reason it would be unfair to chastise fiction writers for their online mythomania. The problem is that most online literary porkers lie carelessly, and this results in poor porky pies. In what follows I will analyse some of the common pitfalls of this hapless genre. The aim is to help you lie effectively; it’s up to you whether you want to apply this knowledge to your writing or to chasing clout online.
Online writerly lying falls mainly into two categories: lies about extraordinary relatives (especially kids and spouses) and lies about extraordinary life events.
This thematic indigence is the first problem with the genre. Most people aren’t extraordinary and we can say the same about most lives. Yes, exceptional people do exist and extraordinary events do occur but if you leave it to a mediocre porker to capture them… Well, this is a recipe for disaster… Unless you are a true artist of fantasy leave extraordinary events and the hagiography of extraordinary people to someone else, and consider telling porkies about mundane affairs and the average folk who surround you. In this way you will expand the possibilities of your fabulation1, whilst avoiding the dangerous territories of The Marvellous. More importantly, it’s easier to believe badly-concocted lies when these deal with the unspectacular. “Why would someone be so pathetic as to lie about that kind of thing?” the reader will think, “Why not write a memoir and sell one hundred copies instead?”